Category Archives: Grow

Learning who I am and what I feel one day at a time. Not striving for perfection but the best me…

DreamCatcher

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Filed under $#!T& and Giggles, Explore, Grow

R3ligion & Slav3ry

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Filed under Grow

Childish

We sadly turn on our televisions and hear stories where a child is taken from an abusive home covered in dirt and grime.  They’re bathed and nurtured then out comes this amazing, resilient being whose heart is still capable of love, trust, and purity.  Belief… They grow up to be not only survivors, but protectors.  They fearlessly share their stories with the world, so others can know it’s ok to be broken and there is redemption.  We admire those children and commend their strength.  Yet, we judge ourselves and others for being fallible.  We don’t give ourselves a break from imperfection, struggle, and hardship.  We blame ourselves “It’s my fault!” we say.  Then we punish ourselves with self recrimination and vice.

Too often we say we have faith, and quietly crumble.  I hold on to the child inside me b/c the adult is too cynical and not as strong.  My “inner child” lets me see the world without being jaded.  It allows people I love to hurt me and I instantly forgive them and allow them to make things right.  It lets me laugh when I fall or make a mistake.  It enables me to find joy in little inane things.  It allows me to share because I love.  It makes me unafraid to receive love.  It keeps me from worrying if I get too dirty or banged up when doing the things that I love.  It makes me brave enough to go out in the world each day to try to succeed again.  My childishness is the best part of me because without it, I’d be hopeless and prone to despair…

but here I am, coloring outside the lines and using all the crayons that I treasure in a shabby box.

Travel Light,

Kg

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Filed under Grow, Love, Nurture

“Because all I have to give,  is music”

—Chet Baker [Chet’s Romance circa 1989]

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Filed under Explore, Grow, Love

Streams of Conscious

Inspiration:

1

two steps forward

& two steps back

All we have is now

2

How do you follow up

I love you?

“Say baby, life’s no good if you ain’t in it”

3

I was channeling surfing for a connection

Nothing was on ‘cept you

running through my mind

4

chugga chugga

if you’re the conductor of this movement

I’ll board

5

I write all our mistakes

every bad thing we say

It makes us tragically beautiful

6

missed opportunities

Easter is about redemption

not disappointment

7

our time was borrowed

my heart, a loan

and I want my shit back

8

Risks!

You should stick to poker

the bets are clearer than love

9

The harder I run and resist

all those sharp rights

led me back to your side

10

It’s not that I’m weak

or foolish

but those flowers you gave me

were wrapped in parchment paper

shaped like a dunce cap

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Filed under Grow, Love

Diary of a Happy Black Woman

This isn’t an angry face

just because it doesn’t

contain a smile.

 They always stop me

“Why you look so angry”

Is that what you see?

An unhappy me, when I’m thinking

When I’m calm, at peace-

It’s turbulence at sea

Do black women have

the freedom to just be?

Must I be menacing

When I’m just listening

Just breathing

taking it all in

Am I granted

the luxury

given white women

on streets?

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Filed under Explore, Grow

Something Borrowed, Something Blue

“I don’t ever want to show anyone my physical and psychological wounds and scars without telling them what caused me to hurt, what it will take to heal me, and what collectively and responsibly should be done to prevent similar injuries from ever happening, again – for me or to others”

-Assotto Saint

I found this great quote from a blog I follow, brohogany. when I was making my rounds this morning.  If you get a chance, check out his site.  It’s full of insight, love, and understanding.  I don’t know how I discovered it, I’m just glad I did… I think you will be too.

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Filed under Grow, Nurture